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I should be packing right now. Or emptying the dishwasher. Or retrieving the corner of the tuna sandwich my cat just snagged from my plate and took under the couch.

But, instead I’m going to blow your mind. I hope you’re ready for this.

I lost 15 pounds in the last 3 weeks.

Seriously. I was a tight 8 and now I’m a 4.

Five kinds of crazy, right? Would you like to know how I did it?

I’m an eater. I’m Italian, I love food, I love to cook, I eat a piece of cold pizza while two more pieces warm up in the microwave, I love cheese and bread and pasta and cold cuts.

Fortunately, I’ve always been an exerciser as well.

Until about two years ago when I stopped working out “for just a few months”. I was busy working and moving and being depressed about money and I just plain didn’t feel like it.

Around this time I also discovered Trader Joe’s $3.99 chardonnay and their wide array of frozen party appetizers. (Party in my elastic pants!) Let’s just say that Trader Joe’s and I became the bestest of friends. I hoped that token exercise here and there and maybe…good genes?…would prevent me from gaining weight. Tragically, physics won.

I steadily gained about A POUND A MONTH for two years until two months ago when I weighed as much as I did at six months pregnant.

Yeah, you read that right.

I started wearing only yoga pants. I cried every time I was in my closet. I threw jeans around. My skin broke out. My nails and hair were weak and brittle. I was aging quickly. My heart would thud in my chest when I would get up from the couch. I was TIIIIRED.

I felt and looked awful.

Then Oprah got involved. As she often does.

The episode was about the movie Food, Inc. and Oprah had Alicia Silverstone on. I think animals were getting hurt in the movie or something, but ANYWAY about Alicia Silverstone’s skin.


Alicia has been a vegetarian for 12 years and claims that she owes her beautiful skin to her lifestyle. She’s a year older than I am and yet I look like her sad, lonely, much older, saggy-pored sister.

Hey! I thought. I used to be a vegetarian! I can do that!

And so it began.*

I immediately cut out all animal products except for my morning latte. (Also referred to as “Lena’s meds”.) Next I found a good fruit smoothie recipe to start my mornings. I knew myself well enough to know that if I didn’t start my day with something healthy and filling I would find myself face first in a bagel by noon.

Then I added the simplest, most unintimidating form of exercise I could think of: walking. And here’s the thing. This is the controversial part. This is THE SECRET to weight loss that professionals don’t want to admit.

Exercise makes you gain weight.

I’ve been a gym rat for years. Trust me. Working out makes you swell, it makes you hungry.

Don’t misunderstand. Exercise has its place. You need it for your health. Plus, the best body I’ve ever had was when I worked out with a trainer. But, for a quick loss – to get over the hump and make some fast progress – calorie restriction is where it’s at.

(I love saying “where it’s at”. It’s so grammatically incorrect, it’s decadent.)

Here’s an easy way to remember: Diet for weight; Exercise for shape.

Every morning I started my day with my smoothie – if you just can’t wait another minute, the recipe’s at the bottom – and a handful of walnuts for protein.

For lunch, I would either have fruit or another smoothie and at dinnertime I would eat just the side dishes I made for Chris and Savannah (broccoli and rice, for example).

Granted, my calorie intake was pretty low and that’s not for everyone, but for me it worked. I wasn’t exerting a lot of energy, I had a low level hunger that was easily managed, I drank a ton of water and the best part? After three days the weight just FELL. OFF.

And my skin. My skiiiiin. It completely cleared up. It’s glowy, it’s dewy, it’s soft. True, look. Here’s Yvonne and I last weekend. Please disregard my weird facial contortion. (Oh yeah, and I’m a brunette now. Surprise!)

me yvonne

So, I hit my goal weight so fast I can not believe it. I am convinced it isn’t just what I’m eating, it’s what I’m not eating anymore. No more salt. No more bad fats. No more chemicals. Just clean and green. And mean! And lean!

Moving on.

Now that I’m the weight I want to be I’ve started adding back in weights and cardio. I know from experience that my body will shape up and get tight much quicker now that I’m leaner. I’m doing Jillian Michaels Making the Cut (I complained about it here) three times a week and I’ll keep you posted if I can pick up cars or anything anytime soon.

So, there it is. That’s what I’ve been up to. Being awesome. How are you?

Lena’s Don’t Hate Me Because I’m Beautiful Smoothie


1 banana

strawberries (preferably frozen)

blueberries (preferably frozen)

fresh spinach (you won’t feel a thing, I promise)

ground flaxseed

fresh filtered water

(Resist adding any milk or juice. Trust me, you won’t need it.)

Handful of each of the above ingredients, except the flaxseed because that would be alot, and throw it in the blender. Blend it to a frothiness and drink immediately.

Have one for breakfast, one for lunch – maybe get cr-a-zy and throw in a few extra fruits. I hear oranges are nice. I’m not a fan – and then eat something light for dinner.

Follow with a handful of walnuts and you will feel a burst of energy and jubilee and very soon after some new friends I bet. Or weird looks.

*I’m not a dietician or nutritionist or gynecologist or archaeologist so you probably shouldn’t do anything just because I told you to and without consulting your doctor. But you already knew that because you’re not a moron.


Sorry about the inexact measurements. I use about 1 1/2 cups water, enough to get it to the consistency you want. I like my smoothies pretty thick. As for the flaxseed, I keep a jar fresh ground in the fridge and use about a tablespoon. And I should have mentioned that you cannot taste the spinach AT ALL and I use about 10-15 leaves. Oh, and the ice...about 3-4 cubes. If you're using frozen berries, that will make the smoothie pretty icy already.

As for just throwing it all in a freezer bag the night before as Laura suggested, I guess that would work out just fine. But, seriously, I am the laziest person in the free world and I manage to throw this together in about two minutes. Oh, and here's a HUGE TIP: rinse the blender and lid immediately and put it right back for its next use. (Berries are a bitch when they harden.) Otherwise it becomes a whole sink-to-dishwasher thing and if you're like me that means days before your next smoothie.


mary said...

ok - i may hate you now. but...i may follow your lead. i've been feeling like poo & jiggling like jello, so it just may be time to embrace a change. thanks for the inspiration.

Ali said...

i have been saying it for years. I am so much skinnier when i am not vigorously exercising. When I am running like a damn fool I am hungry and then I eat everything in sight and then I grow these giant muscular thighs.

no thank you.
I'd rather watch what I eat.

ps. How could I possibly hate that? YOU ARE AWESOME!

Unknown said...

I'm going to give your smoothie idea a try. My husband and I started a low cal diet after the new year and so far he's lost a ton of weight (the bastard) and I've only managed about 10 lbs on a good day. My problem is I'm an eater and low cal has been hard for me when I get bored or start craving something sweet then I cheat...especially when he's not around to see me do it.
So at this point I'm up for anything that helps and doesn't leave me feeling hungry and deprived till dinner.
Oh and glowy skin would be an awesome bonus :)

Rachael said...

Hmmm. You're the second person in so many weeks to tell me to try a breakfast smoothie with spinach. (My friend makes them for her kids who won't each vegetables.) Now, I'm curious. And I HAVE flax seed at home too. Not using it, but have it. 15# in 3 wks. - so jealous! I've been busting my butt for 6 and lost 1/2 that.

C said...

good for you! I am sure you feel and look great. My motto is "nothing tastes as good as skinny feels". You may want to check out one of my favorite blogs. If you are going back to vegetarian or not, it's just inspiration for a really healthy life. Plus she has a great recipe for a glowing green smoothie- you glow, the smoothie doesn't.....and just looking at her skin and hair is all the motivation you need to continue on your new path. it's Let me know what you think.

Anonymous said...

how much water in the smoothie?

cindy w said...

Ok, I am totally trying this.

I have some ground flaxseed, but how much do you put in? And how much ice/water do you put in the smoothie? 1/2 cup each or so?

Linsey Farley Jameson said...

Good job, Lena!! You have been busy... being awesome.

Today I start my "lifestyle change" (I read somewhere that if you call it a "diet" you automatically fail...) Anyway, I am glad you posted today. Just the extra motivation I needed.

Keep up the awesome.

Serenity said...

The smoothie sounds yummy - I think I'm going to try it.

And congrats on losing weight and feeling better!

Funny - though I wasn't nearly as crazy with the vegetarian thing, back in November I started trying to lose weight.

And one of the things we've done is eat vegetarian 2-3 nights a week. It does WONDERS.

Though for me, running (I'm training for a half marathon right now) has done the rest.

Either way. WELL DONE!!!


Laura said...

Do you think you could put all the solid ingredients in a freezer baggie the night before and then pop it in the blender in the morning? My breakfast routine has been coffee and more coffee for a long, long time. a smoothie sounds nice. lol

Anonymous said...

I was vegetarian/vegan for 5 years and I can tell you, just being veg. doesn't work for everyone. I actually gained weight when I was vegan because of all the carbs I was eating. And I've had acne through it all too so while food may be some people's skin issue, it's not everybody's. Glad you're feeling great but have you talked to a dr. about the calorie sounds a bit dangerous to me. Good luck!

JP said...

Reading this was perfect timing. Have been thinking a lot about health, etc and making some changes.

I'm excited for you...that really is awesome.

JaxMom said...

Way to go Lena! Good for you :)

Angella said...

I can testify to your hotness from last weekend (and you know I love the brunette).

Good for you! Proud of you.

And as for the exercise thing, I'm "bigger" than I was when I only (strictly) watched what I ate, but I kind of love that I finally have a booty. ;)

thecakemama said...

That is incredible! I read of a similar smoothie when I did the South Beach diet a few years ago. Frozen baby spinach leaves and frozen fruit really are good together. Everyone looked at me like I was crazy when I told them what the smoothie contained. :)

Jules said...

i've been doing a similar thing with a new diet that calls for a protein shake in the morning-I make a similar shake with whey vanilla protein and low sugar chocolate soy milk. I use celery instead of spinach . . .

It is a great way to start the morning.

and I've lost nearly 20 pounds since xmas-with no exercise. I need to start doing that.

If you're in a rush in the morning-you can even make it the evening before-won't have the "icy" texture, but still . . .

j.sterling said...

i totally hate you.
cause it's more fun.

and i think that there is some theory about your blood type and what kinds of food you need for your body- which is why not everyone can just instantly be a vegetarian and continue to FEEL okay and healthy.

anyway.. i totally love that you simplified the weight, shape thing. cause i get freaking HUGE ASS THIGHS and my ass gets BIGGER when i start working out hard. the 30 day shred.. love the intensity of the workouts, but curse the largeness it gives me. MY THIGHS NEED LESS THUNDER FUCK YOU VERY MUCH.

also. great, where was i going with this? oh yeah. no wait. okay. really brain, stick with me here. um. fuck. i think i've lost it.

j.sterling said...

THAT WAS IT.. i remember now. the chemicals and the eating. i totally am trying to do this.. to eat as simply and basically as possible. if the grocery store disappeared, what would we eat? only things we could grow, harvest or kill. i kind of want to eat that way. i assume all the chemicals and other shit they put in processed food- our bodies probably dont' even know what to do with them. although, do i really have to stop eating cupcakes and frosting? cause really... sugar and flour are natural products. butter adn eggs too. so see, totally acceptable.

also, i super duper hate you in a serious way for having the weight just FALL OFF (bitch) after THREE days. that isn't normal.

Unknown said...

definitely jealous of the weight loss! i want to lose 15 and am @ about 5 lbs down now (after 5 weeks). i walk and do yoga - nothing too hard core. thanks for the smoothie recipe! i'll give it a try!

steff said...

1st off, you're beautiful.
2nd, thanx for sharing the smoothie recipe!
i actually signed up for the vegan kick-start diet plan via email which was promoted by Alicia. alas, the most progress i made with that was deleting the daily emails while eating a cheeseburger & sipping on a chocolate milkshake so I still have a long way to go.
your story certainly inspires me though and i think i may give it another shot.
congrats on all your success so far and best of luck with the rest of your journey!

Anonymous said...

Alicia is actually Vegan, she also does not consume dairy of any kind. Although I thought it was cute when she said she slipped up once in a long while, and had a piece of cheese, usually after a glass of wine. ;-)
I totally agree with you on calorie restriction, I was on a "stress diet" during my divorce and lost some serious weight very unhealthily, and I am Vegetarian!
Problem is keeping this type of low cal lifestyle up. The second you eat "normally" again, on comes the weight, unless you truly go Vegan and watch the carb intake.

BOSSY said...

Wow, you sure do look great. But Bossy is awaiting the post about the hair, the HAIR, because that is ten times of awesome too. xoxox

BOSSY said...

By the way, Bossy occasionally gets on a kick and drinks a version of this smoothie -- and it IS good, and the spinach is imperative: it breaks up the cloyingness of fruit. Parsley works too -- and makes it pleasingly bitty...

Ashley said...

I am SO thrilled for you (weird coming from a stranger, I know)! I gained soooo much weight in my last relationship and I have been struggling to peel it off. The more I exercise, the fatter I seem to get. Funny how that works. I am totally going to try that smoothie! And I am totally going to follow in your footsteps. Way to go, hot mama!

Amanda said...

That's awesome, Lena! My trainer will even admit that 80% of weight loss is diet, not exercise. But that 20% that *is* exercise is helped tremendously by weight-lifting. I went from a 14 to a 4 in less than seven months by cutting out white sugar and white flour (essentially South Beach levels two and three) and hitting the gym, especially the weight equipment, HARD. Never gave up booze, but I only drink a little once or twice a month anyway. Last week, I was able to fit into a 2 skinny jean. My problem now is: I know how to gain it, and I know how to lose it, but how do I maintain it?

Agent P or MamaJan said...

Awesome! I've lost 10 pounds in just over a month. But haven't dropped much in size yet. And I didn't see the Oprah so I'm eating meat. But only veggie carbs. (And the occasional sweet.)

And I LOVE the brunette!!

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Sugar said...

I have frozen strawberries in my freezer right now! Does that mean I'm on a diet?
Hope you are doing great! :-)

Unknown said...

I had the smoothie today and I must say, that banana is it's only saving grace! LOL! It WOULD be sooo much better with some yogurt or vanilla soy milk!
But, it's not BAD, at all, and if you can drop weight on it that fast, I'll take it for the jumpstart!
Thanks Lena! :-)

Laura said...

This totally works. I'm here to tell you. Thank you!

statia said...

That sounds good, and energizing and actually remotely healthy. And better than starving myself until I eat a bag of low fat snacks.

Barbara Fryman said...

I have been considering the spinach smoothie for a long time, but you have sent me over the edge. I swim 3 days a week, two of which are at 05:30am. This little smoothie is the extra kick of energy when I don't want to go.

I would love to drop 15lbs in 3 weeks, but the exercise is my xanax, and you are right, building muscle does add weight, but then you burn more efficiently later. Not to mention that swimming makes me voracious. Luckily, you have reminded me that the calories I put in my mouth matter, not just the amount. Thanks! (And you are gorgeous!)

Pepper Culpepper said...

omg'sh that's the most unhealthy thing I've ever heard of. You can't get nutrients out of a low calorie diet. Pardon me, but I'm confused. Exercise makes you gain weight? Well, duh. It's muscle, not fat.

Pepper Culpepper said...

Exercise makes you gain weight? Well, duh. But it's muscle and not fat.

Anonymous said...

Just made this! Sooo good...but I doubled the recipe (for me & hubz) and it made an entire blender!

From Costco I used the large frozen strawberries...they were out of blueberries, so I got the blueberrie/marionberrie/razberrie blend. Sooooo good! Thank you!

Marcela said...

I exercise like CRAZY! ALL THE TIME! And true, I can never loose the weight!!!

You are awesome! I always try to change my eating habits to what you are talking about, but always get SO hungry!

I think less exercise for me for a bit, and more focusing on healthy eating.


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