It would be so boring if I told you I was busy.

Like, "Yeah, we get it, Lena. You're busy. Then why don't you just shut down your blog if you're not going to, you know, write on it?". But, see that's the thing. I will never stop writing. This is just a temporary phase - I'm only busy right now because my business is so new and it is kicking my bee-hind.

I've been trying to think of exactly how to explain how overwhelmed I've been and decided I should just show you in a highly technical representation, me being a professional entrepreneur and all.

This is me. (Yes, I'm a natural blond. And I got those pants at the Gap.)

This is your brain.

This is my business.

This is your brilliant business idea.

This is how it has been running my business.

This is your brain on your brilliant business idea.

In a word, brutal.

But, then! I bought a DayPlanner at Office Depot yesterday!

This is your brain figuring it out.

That's right. Who's driving who now, biznitch?

Oh, wait. I forgot my clients.

Now, get some clients.

There we go. Perfect.

(Hey, do you think this would count as my business plan? Wells Fargo still hasn't gotten back to me about my loan.)

So, things should be improving here shortly.

I admit I've been getting a kick out of those of you that have emailed me inquiring about what exactly my business is. My favorite was Amanda who emailed me again after not receiving a response and said simply "If I don't hear otherwise soon, I'm going to just assume avon".

Actually, the reason why I've been vague is because I started a consulting business. And it's sort of funny. Because, well, um, I don't know if I've ever told you guys this but in my former life? I was a bank real estate specialist. Which is to say, that the nightmare we just endured for the last six months was sort of my area of expertise, if you will. I know. It's a crazy world.

Also, please note that I'm now using "*" in any words applicable to my line of work because the last thing I want is for my new clients to find my blog.

Because, you know, the internet gets around.

And then they'll know all about my own selling disaster, which would be bad. And that I own a Michael Bolton t-shirt, which would be worse, no?

Anyhoo. That's what I've been doing - working from home helping people get out of their own fin*ncial disasters. I couldn't be busier or more thrilled (thrillsier?).

Believe it or not, I loved my old job in banking and have missed it. I didn't think I'd be able to get back into it with Savannah's limited school hours, so I'm pretty damn ecstatic to be doing it again in a c*nsulting capacity. Because I love helping people. And also because it pays well.

But, mostly the helping people part. Helping people pay me well, that is! Oh, I slay me.

So, the Casa de Cheeky Lotus has gone from drab to fab in just a few short weeks. With a new city, new friends, new colleagues, a new man, a new job in L.A., and being picked up for the entire season...wait, that's Private Practice.

All this to say, I am in fact the "B" word. Busy doing something I love. For that I feel blessed. Also, deprived of the internet's warm fuzzy company. I'm still working on the whole balance thing, but it's finally starting to come together.

Which...brings me to my next point.

As you've probably heard, ClubMom is shutting its Mom Blogs doors.

I can't say I was entirely surprised when I received the news last week. Just call it a hunch. If you recall, when I was hired by ClubMom/ABC a year and a half ago I was beyond ecstatic. I had only been writing for a short time and to actually be paid real shiny quarters for my werrds, and in an email from Andrew Shue no less, was a huge confidence boost. It was exactly the distraction I needed during the most difficult time in my life - my dad's sudden death - and I will be forever grateful for that.

That said, I will be the first one to admit that I felt my ClubMom blog had run its course. There is only so much time in a day and at one point recently I had five writing jobs, including the work I do for them on their sister site CafeMom.

I think this is a common burden felt by bloggers right now. We don't want to pass up opportunities, we take on everything we're offered, and then our passion - writing - starts to become a job. An obligation.

I'm looking forward to writing being nothing more than a luxury for me again. Although, I will continue to keep an ad or two around to pay for my -ahem- "expenses". Primarily for the purposes of claiming to Chris all exasperated that I "have to write" so that I can run upstairs with a glass of wine and take pictures of Savannah's toys driving around in cars while he makes dinner.

Speaking of ads, you'll notice that I'm no longer part of the Blogher Ad Network. There's really nothing to say about that other than that I have the utmost respect for the community, and hopefully they'll have me back if I change my mind in the future. But, for now I've decided to accept an offer from Warner Bros.' network, the Mom Logic Ad Network.

Warner Bros. approached a few writers awhile back, including Yvonne and me, and asked us to come into the studio to "shoot an episode" of a yet unnamed series. After Yvonne and I peed ourselves, we agreed. Well, we had our roots done. Then we agreed.

Yvonne wrote a little about her experience here and since I assume your eyes are glazed over at this point in this post, I'll save my story for next time.

In the meantime, here's an actual conversation from that day to whet your appetite:
Me: "I'm so nervous. We haven't even started filming and I smell like a sheep."

Producer: "Are you perspiring?"

Me (flapping arms): "Yes, badly."

Makeup Lady: "Here, stuff these paper towels in your armpits."

Obviously they were wowed.

Anyway, if you want to check out their site - and, eventually, streaming video of my taping - you can press your wee mouse here.

Okay, more new things to come, including a site redesign! But, for now, I must go. Savannah is demanding I explain why Mike is in Barbie's car.


Kelly said...

congrats on the c*ns*lt*ng b*s*n*ss (see what I did there?) and whatnot. I'm geeked for you! <3

Butrfly Garden said...

After writing something about the g*yno, I totally get the Wo*rd disguising thing. I went back and edited the post just so those damn "Gy*o F*t*sh" creeps would stop finding me.

Oh, Yeah! We're talking about you, huh? I'm glad you found a job that gives you joy. That is so important.

And I loved the barbie portrayal of your life. Hard Core.

prescott said...

From the pics I thought perhaps you had started a limo service.

Good luck with the new biz!

Artemisia said...

Well, I've missed your posts but Go YOU! Nothing like gainful employment helping people. Me, I'm not helping people one little bit with my gig, but I LOVE THE PAYCHECK!

Happy Thanksgiving!

Heather B. said...

Oh so apparently I'm not the only person who has been too busy just living to write about it in extensive detail. This makes me feel better about myself. Though really now, how exciting would it be to hear "Today I was tired and almost flipped my shit at work over paper clips then had to come home and listen to my roommate have sex"? Actually, don't answer that one.

Congrats for handling the changes in stride.

Laural Dawn said...

I was hoping you were just busy!
Glad to hear things are going well. I totally know what you mean about a new job making everything crazy. But, once you're in the groove of things it will get easier!
Enjoy it!

Anonymous said...

The whole ** thing in words is awesome - it's like this post was just really obscene without it being at all so. I am reading not-porn!!

dcrmom said...

Thanks for the update! This all sounds very exciting. Congrats!!!

Anonymous said...

Lena, your clients will really appreciate the compassion & empathy you bring to an incredibly uncomfortable and stressful time in their lives. No one could better understand what they're going through.

Talk about making lemon aid! I think Barbie would be proud.

Chic Mommy said...

I love how you described your life in the pics with Barbie, hilarious! But loved more the part about how you describe the passion of writing turning into an obligation, that was so spot on. I've become a slacker blogger too, I wish I could say it was a real job keeping me from writing, but it's not. I'm just being run over by a bunch of kids.

Congrats on the new job!

chicken said...

Congrats and all that...but my big question is...When did Barbie start driving a teal Volvo wagon? What the hell happened to her in the last 10...err...30 years? She had a 'vette and camper...where she made out with Ken...maybe that was just at my house?
Anyway...This new gig sounds great for you...and will probably provide some great blog material...I look forward to hearing more!!

Mom101 said...

If you are going to leave a post up for a week, this is a good one. Your photo essay could speak to many of us. (Except for the blonde part. Or the minivan part.)

janny226 said...

Love, love, love the visuals. But as I relook a them, I must ask... Is your carpet really thick enough that Barbie can stand up in it with her feet sunk in? You a lucky one.

Kristin said...

Yet, we still need to have lunch.

With wine.

Sapphire is calling.

Sarcomical said...

whoo!!! exciting. i just "re-found" you after i-don't-know-what happened (well, actually i think it was me slacking and not organizing my bookmarks and feeds, but whatev). sounds like you'll have some great stuff to write about and i agree, you shouldn't just STOP. there is absolutely nothing wrong with a timely pause.

nothing at all. ;)

Ang said...

We're approaching 2 weeks w/o a post...I guess the business is going well?????

Kristen said...

Did I miss something? Is Lena not posting here anymore? I'm in withdrawal over here! HA! HA! said...

I've been meaning to check in on you, but I've been too busy hanging pictures in the living room.

Do you know where I can find some nice stars?

Jenn said...

Checking in to see if you're posting yet...I keep accessing you through your "30" post.

Cause I'm a stalker like that.

Figured I'd quit lurking and send you a message with best wishes and hopes for a new post soon!

Anonymous said...

Break = good.

Burn out = bad.

A book is written one page at a time!

Hang in there Lena!

KristinS said...

Oh my God, that was so weird. I just clicked over to watch a video, and there you were with Melissa Peterman. I work for her Dad in MN. Small world. Well, I've missed you on your club mom blog, but I'll switch my feed over to this one, and in the mean time, catch up with what I've missed lately. Say "Hi from MN" to Melissa if you see her again! :)

Ashley said...

I'm such a dumbass ... also sleep deprived ... I was all like what's so secretive about saling shirts and why does she need that title. for. shirts. I gonna take a nap now :)

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