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8.29.2007

The Fat Lady Is Barely Humming

Okay, who wants to hold me? Seriously.

Who wants to hold me??

"The buyers have an issue with their loa*n." Those were my realtor's words yesterday.

I didn't even want to tell you because I know how dramatic and irrational you guys get. (Oh, wait. That's me.) But, since you're along for the ride (and what a ride it has been, eh? Please keep your arms and legs inside at all times.) I think it's only fair that I advise you that we are once again in official wait and see mode. Or as I like to call it, I'm Taking Up Cutting! mode.

What I'm sure I don't need to tell you:
  • I personally called the buyers' ag*nt (surprise! he sounds 16!) at 11:00 last night and blustered incoherently.
  • My hair is falling out in clumps.
  • I have hives.
  • I'm smacking myself in the head with a shovel every hour to see which feels worse - a head wound or selling a house in this market. (So far, the shovel feels like a gentle summer breeze.)

In other words, I'm losing it.

My realt*r had an hour long conversation with the buyers' ag*nt last night and he assured us - assured us - that we would hear from him by 10:00 this morning with signed loa*n docs. It is now 10:08.

And mommy is Googling Haldol.

34 comments:

Liana said...

Dangit! and/or dagnabbit! Hang in there, Lena! (And please put down that shovel. I'm sure it won't have good long-term effects...)

Shelby said...

I have my fingers crossed for you. I really hope everything works out for your family.

Butrfly4404 said...

Your realtor is really bad with times, aren't they (or rather, deadlines)?

Hang in there, girl.

superblondgirl said...

My dad got some Valium for his dentist appointment - maybe I can steal some and FedEx it to you? Ugh. I hope everything is okay. I can't believe so much can go wrong with a seemingly simple thing like real estate.

Mere said...

It might not be the agents fault (says they real estate agent). All the drama in the lending industry has really hosed up the process. It could be the lenders have not delivered docs (and they do not tend to warn anyone they are not going to deliver docs). I would suggest that you suggest that the buyers re-qualify for another loan RIGHT NOW if they are getting any bullshit from the lender. I think you might know lenders, but I have a great one up here (Northern CA) who has been saving deals for us left and right, works for a large mortgage bank and is totally trustworthy and on top of who has stopped funding certain loans.

❉ pixie ❉ said...

Please say they called.

Anonymous said...

I hope you sell that house.
How nervewracking, but with the way they are getting picky about loans it does not surprise me.
hugs...

Wack-A-Do said...

Hang in there, Lena. My guess is your buyers want this house as much as you want to sell it. The problem is probably the jumbo loan jitters but people will find a way to get the money. It's not like they can walk down the street and get into a house that doesn't require a jumbo. Fingers, toes and eyes are crossed.

Shauna Loves Chocolate said...

I can only hope that the reason you haven't yet received a call is because they are working to fix the 'issues' so everything will go through.

lisa said...

EGADS woman, i'm dying here. please tell us they called! even the short little hairs on my arms are crossed!

Laural Dawn said...

That happened to us. Literally when we were in the moving truck that happened.His loan fell through. I had a nervous breakdown and had to stop at McDonalds because I could not breathe.
We had to give them extra time to secure a new loan. It took 5 days. All the banks were very understanding.
Breathe. It's their problem.

DianaCLT said...

It's 4:26. Do you know where your buyers are?
Please - tell me they've called! Tell me that you're out doing a happy dance with a Margarita in one hand, and a Cosmopolitan in the other (Just tried one for the first time the other night. Can anyone say "YUM!"?!?)!
We're all crossing (almost) all of our everythings!

Anonymous said...

CRAP! I have been checking back daily, and assumed the quiet was a good sign, that you were hung-over from partying your ass off on a four-day bender.

Good luck, and I promise to cross every finger as soon as I sign off.

Karly said...

I have my fingers crossed! Hope it works out for you!

Ginny said...

Awww...jeez, Lena! So sorry! We are all rooting for you. I hope it's all worked out by now! Fingers crossed!

islaygirl said...

my God, Lena, POST, POST for God's sake.

Loralee Choate said...

Why does this seem like some horrific Lifetime Television for Women moment of "Conflict".

They had damn well better bring on the sappy, too-good-to-be-true ending after all of this is what I have to say about THAT!

Kim said...

UGH! Now it's after 10pm and still no update, was hoping we would hear that they called you at 10:09am to tell you that all was signed and well.

Saying a prayer and hoping that this all works out in the morning.

Caroline said...

Lena, I cannot imagine what you and your husband must be going through. May these moments soon be nothing more than a bit of undigested pudding. Please post when you can, and know that we are all out here in Blogjunkieland, sending good thoughts in your direction.

Artemisia said...

Lena, I haven't commented before but had to pipe and say "LISTEN TO MERE!" We just bought our house in a far less difficult area (market is still strong here), my credit is good, we had over 30% down, and the mortgage process was fucking horrendous. Everything was GREAT! GREAT! GREAT!, per the lender, and then it got to underwriting and EVERY SINGLE DAY the regs changed (or the underwriter tried a new med) and EVERY SINGLE DAY there was a new demand for more information before they'd finalize approval. Our tax returns for five years. A letter from my employer. A blood sample. Financial statements from my employer (a start-up). You get the picture. It took us three weeks longer than it should have. Good thing our seller wasn't in a hurry to close.

If I had to do it over again, I would have worked with three lenders simultaneously so I could drop anyone that pulled that bullshit. Your buyers may need to find a new lender or two.

Daren said...

I hope it's all worked out and you're just too busy celebrating to post.

Our house was foreclosed on a couple of years ago and there are worse things. Not many, but you can and WILL survive. Promise. Pinky-swear, even.

MommasWorld said...

Today is August 30th and I am sending all the good vibes I can muster out your way today.

Keeping my fingers crossed!

Kathy said...

Duuude. W.T.F. Did you walk under a ladder smashing black cats with mirrors or something?

*crosses fingers*

Kim said...

OOOOOOH! I am hoping the best for you, Im worried that you still havent posted.

If things are messed up with the lender, contact me through my blog. I know the most awesome guy in Laguna Hills that owns his own company and has his own private investors - he can fund most anything and is super nice.

Looking forward to hear that everything worked out fine.

lizinsumner said...

Haldol! I think that's the stuff they gave me while I was in labor, that made the ceiling breathe!!!!! Uhm, step away from the haldol, Lena.

Hang in there, kiddo. My house WAS in foreclosure when my realtor called me to tell me that the (first!!) buyers' financing had just fallen through because they hadn't been {{cough, cough}} entirely forth-coming about their current income - less than a week before closing......I moved around some furniture, threw down some beauty bark out front, and it went back on the market - sold again in 3 days, this time to someone who's income was evidently solid.

It always looks darkest just before the dawn, or, something along those lines......

Jhianna said...

You're killing me woman! What's the scoop? Everything's fine, right? Right?

anne at annenahm.com said...

ZOMG - update plz!

lisa said...

YOU'RE KILLING ME OVER HERE!! i hope the silence means that everything's GOLDEN and happy.. PLEASE POST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

lisa

mamatulip said...

Holy fuck. It just does NOT STOP for you.

Keep on keepin' on, girl.

shana said...

Lena, please let us know what is going on. I keep checking your site every hour praying for good news!

islaygirl said...

look Lena, we all love you. we are all worried. TELL US. xx

and the Internet said...

I'm confused, but I'm here if you ever want to talk about it. Whatever happened, I hope you're already recovering (or in recovery). Tink-tink. Cheers!

p.s. people with nothing but good luck are never funny -- and who wants that?

Tracey said...

Lena, I would tell you not to get your panties in a bunch, but somehow I don't think that would help you right now. I was in the same place 2 years ago, the DAY BEFORE SETTLEMENT and it all worked out in the end. A weekend later, but it worked out. Good luck!

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