Pages

8.24.2007

Choices

Six weeks ago Chris and I lay in bed one night going over and over the figures into the wee hours of the next morning.

We spoke of due dates, m*rtgage adjustments, market losses, credit card cash advances, liquidating retirement accounts, personal loans, listing times, price reductions. We mentally clung so tightly to the hope that we would be able to get an offer that would pay these m*rtgages and make us all whole again if we just pulled on all of our resources.

Extracting ourselves from that hope was physically painful that night.

That night we came to the realization that we would face f*reclosure if we didn't sell.

"We're running out of time" I said into the darkness.

My heart literally ached inside my chest. I couldn't believe that we were going to be "those people". I thought "those people" didn't pay their bills. I thought "those people" bought flat screen TV's and jet skis and black leather couches while they ignored their credit card bills. I thought "those people" were lazy. I thought "those people" were looking for a handout. I didn't know that those people are people who can have ten years of impeccable credit. That those people can have degrees. That those people can get up at the crack of dawn every morning and go to work. That those people can get up in the middle of the night and open bills, so that their spouse doesn't have to see them crying again.

I lay there that night six weeks ago and the sobs just came.

I had spent almost a year hoping beyond hope that hard work would get us the offer we needed on the house. And now, here we were. We had failed. I had failed. We were going to be those people.

Chris tried to reach out to me and I leaped up and ran to the bathroom where I sobbed with such intensity - such grief - that I shook uncontrollably. I saw everything, everything, Chris and I have worked so hard for being pulled out from under us like that. In just a handful of weeks' time.

It was the next morning that Chris saved us.

He woke me up. He sat very still at the end of the bed and I got the impression that he had been up for hours.

"This is what we're going to do" he started. His tone was unrecognizable. Calm and resolved.

From that moment, he and I put together a two-fold plan. We would walk away from the house and secure a new roof over our heads. Then we would attack the selling of our home with a fierceness. We would be relentless with out realt*r. We would be unstoppable with our m*rtgage companies. We would not take no for an answer (and we were told no plenty of times). We would offer creative s*lutions to the m*rtgage companies. We would write long letters appealing to their good nature. We would fill their inbox with our pleas.

We knew the numbers were against us. But, we would not go down without a fight.

Our fight made this morning's phone call all the sweeter. Everything has been approved. We close August 31, maybe sooner.

F*reclosure was set to begin September 1.

I'm going to take a nap now.

74 comments:

Anonymous said...

Congratulations, Lena!

Ash said...

Boo-fucking-YAH! Woooooot!
Happy dance, right after nap time. Followed of course, but celebratory Margherita's!
Congrats, m'dear!

Heather B. said...

HOLY FUCK! WHEEEEEEEEEEE!

I'm so excited for you! Take a nap and then pop some champagne. Congratulations.

Y said...

Am crying tears of happiness for you.

Kelly said...

Aw yeah. Awesome. Very, very nice. I'm very happy for you. :-)

jen from boston said...

is it weird I am crying tears of relief for you? at my desk. at work. well done.

Ho-ho-ly shit, that was close.

Yah, take that congratulatory nap.

jen from boston said...

Did nt see Y's comment until after I posted. I guess it is not weird to be crying the happy tears.

Amanda said...

I'm so happy for you! I know this fight all to well! Good luck!

Janssen said...

I'm sweating and shaking with relief for you. What a huge relief.

jakelliesmom said...

Lena,

I'm coming out of my lurker-hood to extend my warmest congratulations (along with huge a sigh of relief). I've followed your saga with such anticipation, and am thrilled for you and your family to be able to move forward.

Hugs,
Karen

Cheryll said...

Me too!! I am sitting here crying at my desk! Congrats I am SO happy for you.

Cassie said...

That's such an amazing announcement! Congrats!!!!

Lee said...

Congratulations!

Laural Dawn said...

I'm sooooooooo happy for you! That's the best news ever.

Alicia said...

If I'm this relieved? I can only imagine how you must feel!

Congratulations. Have a few cocktails and celebrate!

Lola Goetz said...

i got goosebumps. so glad it was approved, doll. big hugs.

becky
misspriss.org

Nancy said...

That's great, Lena. You deserve to celebrate for days.

Dad Gone said...

KICKIN' ASS AND TAKIN' NAPS! It's the new Tae-Bo.

Shana said...

That is so awesome!! I have been checking your page several times a day hoping for good news for you! Congrats!

superblondgirl said...

Hurrah!!! Yay, break out the champagne!

Bobealia... said...

Wow! Fighters! Congrats! You deserve a nap and more!

canape said...

You probably heard my sigh of relief all the way over there, but I thought I would post it anyway.

Miss said...

That is fucking awesome!!! If there is anyone out there that deserves this, it is you and Chris. Now you are those "other" type of people. Congrats times 1000!!! How's sleeping going to be for you tonight??

sauchagirl said...

I can only imagine that your nap must feel like it needs to be days and days. Congrats!

I'm going out to celebrate for you! Margaritas on me here in PA!

janet said...

Holy cow that makes me so happy and relieved.

Lena said...

You guys rock. Cheers, my interweb friends.

Virenda said...

I have just imagine your huge sigh of relief. It's over, it's finally over. I hope the next coming years can help you forget and ease back into the "happy" life.

Anonymous said...

Geez, could you have possibly cut it any closer? :)
I'm glad it is working out for you.

Lisa

Michelle Smiles said...

Must be a tremendous weight off your shoulders. Take a deep breath and enjoy not having to fret.

Ginny said...

So very happy for you! You guys did an awesome job! Congrats!

Anonymous said...

I've never met you-- why does this matter? But it does! You feel like a valued friend. I kept checking back to see what happened-- not like I was checking for the end of a movie or a book, but like you would for a friend. I'm glad. And like many others, I'm going to get a congratulatory drink to you. Except mine comes from a box of wine in my fridge. Love ya (and Chris and Savannah), Lena. Blue skies ahead (yes, I'm still anonymous. One of these days I'll figure out how to put another name, but I'm too busy heading to the kitchen for that glass of really inexpensive libation). :-)

sweetney said...

woot! go lena go!!

lisa said...

i am sitting here in tears of happiness for you!!!!!!! thank GOD!!!!!!!!!! congrats.. breathe... and smile..

hugs, lisa

Janelle said...

Fantastic!!

DianaCLT said...

Aaaaaah!!!!! I was shaking the entire time I read your post! I'm SOOOO happy for you guys, but the suspense was killing me! I should have just scrolled to the end, and then read from the top once I was crying tears of joy for you! Instead, I was shaking, having a hard time focusing, out of the anticipation of how it would end.

Congratulations, Lena! You have come through this with perseverence and a sense of humor. And you are a stronger person for this experience. Now - go enjoy a margarita and some lovin' from that hubby who has endured all of this alongside you. :)

Caroline said...

YES!!!! Yes, yes, yes! I am so thrilled for you both. How lovely to see your husband like that; I am guessing it made you fall in love with him all over again. When the mens come through like that, it's breathtaking.

O Lena. With all my heart, I wish you peaceful, happy days.

Mim said...

I only started reading your blog a couple of weeks ago, but I had shivers running down my spine reading this post. Such wonderful news! I am so very happy for you.Congratulations :)

Kim J said...

I don't think I have ever commented, but there was no way i could NOT comment today.

CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!

Kim j

Jennifer said...

Congratulations, Lena! That's great news. I've been hoping it would all work out.

Missy said...

We are becoming "those people" right now. I'm so scared. And we are trying to f*ing hard not to be in this position. We are at the beginning of the end of our rope, and not sure how to hold on. I'm so f*ing scared.

Loralee Choate said...

I'm completely happy for you.

dcrmom said...

Wow. I'm so excited for you. I hope it all goes smoothly from here on out.

Major Bedhead said...

Congratulations! That's great news. What a relief.

Brillig said...

Just had to add my "congrats" to your list. I'm so happy for you. Yay!

Kim said...

Oh Lena!!!! YAY!!!!!!!!
SO happy for you. :-D

eriknova said...

way to go yeah

islaygirl said...

excellent!!!! that which does not chapter 11 us only makes us ... blah de blah blah. so glad the page has finally turned on all this.

myminivanisfasterthanyours said...

I can just FEEL your excitement! What a great weekend you must be having.

So much relief. Happy, happy times!

Congrats!

Chris said...

great news! so happy for you.

Sarah said...

Congratulations! I've been following you through this whole process and am so glad to finally be watering up with tears of relief and happiness for you and your family.

chirky said...

That was so emotionally intense I felt like throwing up.

I'm so glad things have worked out for you!

Sonja said...

Whoooooooohoooooooo!

chicken said...

I am also afraid I have become one of "those people..." I am glad that it worked out for you, Lena!! I am hoping to have the same kind of luck!
Congrats!!

Liana said...

WOOOHOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (from a relatively new reader, first time commenter). Yay!!!! :) :) So happy for you guys! All that hard work paid off and finally the burden is lifted from your shoulders. Wonderful news. :)

Pam said...

I only knew you from your blog, but I am thrilled for you and your husband that this worked out. Or, at least, to quote the Magic 8 Ball, "all signs point to yes."

Your honesty in how you got to this place, and your plans to never visit this place again, are much appreciated by this person, who has a ticket to that place which, every day, I pray does not get punched.

Anonymous said...

Wow. If anyone deserves a nap right now, it's you. Congratulations.

Frema said...

I'm heaving a HUGE sigh of relief for you over here. After a rough year, you guys are finally getting what you deserve: Chris's new job, freedom from real-estate hell, a sweet-ass car, and much-needed peace of mind.

CONGRATULATIONS! I'm so excited for all of you. :)

Stephanie D. said...

Congrats to you both - I'm relieved and so happy for your entire family!

My thoughts for what they're worth: God is good all the time and ALL the time God is good.

:)

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
B Side Mama said...

Found your blog awhile ago and am delurking to say congrats! I'm glad that you guys are pulling through!

Tara said...

So, so happy for you. Hope you enjoyed your nap--you earned it, girl.

lisa said...

Uh Lena? what the heck is the response in the comments? I was feeling the need to smile, so i thought i'd read all the happy notes to you on your most recent post. Then I come across this.. this THING... it's ridiculously long with a whole lot of anger at religion, Jews, politics and more.

Now i need comfort.. lol.

lisa

takin chances said...

I couldn't be more excited for you and your husband!!! Congrats! Have a whole bottle of wine. :)

Jhianna said...

Oh yeah! I'm so glad for you guys!

anne at annenahm.com said...

That is wonderful news!

Butrfly4404 said...

YAY! Holy shit that was close, huh? I'm SO happy for you guys!!!!

Suburban Turmoil said...

This is awesome, awesome news. I'm so happy for you!! And I'll be even happier when everything's DONE. :)

DianaCLT said...

I'm with Lisa. What IS all of the horrible, crazy-ass, sacreligious, racist crap? Can it be deleted? It obviously has nothing to do with your situation, but someone who has opted to vomit all over your happy dance. Sheesh!

Anyway - have you come down from your high yet? Hope not! :)

Lena said...

That's my brother in law, you guys. He gets carried away.

Ha!

Deleted. It was scar-ing me.

Wack-A-Do said...

Worried when you didn't post the next day. Feared the worst. So, so happy to hear that your nightmare is almost over. Congrats, Lena!

blog Portland said...

It appears that half the blogging world de-lurked to offer their congrats to you. Just know that mine is way more important than theirs.

susies said...

Oh. I'm so relieved for you. Fierce and determined and successful. All very, very good things. omg, you must feel like you can BREATHE. Did you cry? I would have cried. A lot. I'm soooo happy for you.

D said...

That's awe-some! Would be mixing a drink in your honor if wasn't nine trillion months pregnant.

Summer said...

I'm so happy for you! Things were so close and you absolutely pulled this one out of your sassafrass! Congrats!


 photo copyright.jpg
envye template.