I Made $100,000 In M*rtgage Payments and All I Got Was This Rotten T-Shirt

I called the stylist last night and told her off. Told her voice mail off, anyway. The mullet made me do it. I think it's giving me special powers.

It is not like me at all to voice my anger like that, but last night after I washed my hair and tried to style it I wanted to punch someone. It really is such a ridiculous haircut that there is no rhyme or reason to it. It's not even like it's a bad haircut - its just like no haircut. As if someone had to cut gum out of my hair. I look like an angry 5-year-old's doll.

So, I ranted, hung up, put my hair in ponies (lord help us all), and went back to packing.

We move to our new house this weekend.

The positive thinker in me was convinced that we would get an offer as soon as we signed a lease on another house. The positive thinker in me hoped that by simply relaxing, our house would sell. (Like when infertile adopting couples get pregnant! They LOVE it when you point that out! Now I know why.)

The Secret told me that if I packed up my crap and focused on a better life, then I would attract a buyer. The secret told me that the key was to align my thoughts and actions.

And yet:


The Secret is a dirty lie. It's no better than that duplicitous Victoria.

We have relaxed. We have moved on. Our house continues to sit.

To say that I'm starting to feel shock that we're actually in this position and that I'm writing about it on the internet is an understatement. This wasn't supposed to happen. We had hopes and dreams when we bought this house. We had pride. We had plans. We had security. Now, we have a noose around our necks.

There have been three showings this week, with another one today. I pray that we find the right buyer. Someone who is genuine. Someone who will offer us full price. Someone who can close escrow within a month.

Someone who can blend my "business party".


Tuesday Girl said...

I can't imagine how hard an annoying this all must be!

Butrfly4404 said...

Just don't lose hope, okay? I know it's not easy. But you have to hold on to something.

I'm glad you called that brat about your hair.

~T (that's me) said...

I'm doing the same thing but in a less charming climate. You made me recognize three things:
1. There are only so many things about my situation that I can control and to try and find solution to those things.
2. Worrying doesn't help the situations I can't control.
3. Those orange/chocolate drinks from starbucks can make any situation better for at least 30 minutes.
Thanks for bringing that all to light, I may have gone insane if someone hadn't pointed it out.

Laural Dawn said...

Can your realtor call the people and beg. Like seriously plead? Maybe they will bend - and offer? I would make my realtor do that. Seriously, I once called her sobbing. It was effective, I think.
Keep thinking positive.

Anonymous said...

We could not sell our house until we moved out. It sold within two weeks. It is easier to show without people living in it and it looked much bigger.
I hope the same works for you.
I think your hair dressor should give you a refund. I am proud of you for calling and telling her how you feel. I have had something similar happen in the past..
Maybe after you move you can find someone good to even it up for you.

Miss Kate said...

I don't want to sound like a total whack-job, but have you heard of/tried the St. Joeseph statue trick? My future mother-in-law was in a similar situation. Big hue lake home, had been on the market for TWO YEARS. She (being a devout Slavic Catholic) buried a statue of St. Joe in her yard. Three weeks later, it sold.

I told my mom the story. She said she knew a bunch of people who tried it and had success.

TOTALLY RANDOM. But maybe worth $6.95 and 20 minutes.

Miss Kate said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

I just found your site thru Y's, and usually I dont say much and lurk, I had to post!!! It took us a YEAR to sell our house. AND we got full asking price. We did move to our new house and had 2 mortgages and it was hell and I am surprised our marraige made it, but we did it. We also had to do all kinds of cheap crap to make the house look better. I live in So. California and dont take any offense PLEASE but one of the key factors of getting some sucker to buy our house was painting the walls WHITE. Now I like color and decoration. But apparently buyers want to see a "blank canvas" and get their own ideas. So we spent a weekend painting over the colors I had so carefully picked, and the kicker was when we moved...(that house was EMPTY)Oh and we bought cheap carpet. Stress? Can we say stress? I feel your pain. And I REALLY feel your pain about the walk thru's I used to cram crap and dirty dishes etc...In the washer and dryer. Then we would park up the street and wait. Kinda stalkerish huh?

Anonymous said...

Oh an added P.S. I DID bury a St. Joseph in my backyard. House sold in a month. Just ebay him, you can get one for like 2 bucks.

Melissa said...

Here are all the things I did to get an offer, I don't know which one worked.

I buried three st josephs....two I did wrong I think, the final one is face down (not upside down) as if he's walking away from the house toward the street.

Someone told me to put salt over all the thresholds into my home. So I did it and covered the salt with welcome mats (didn't want buyers to know I was being so desperate).

Also I worried non stop because even when I have no control over things I like to believe I do. And unfortunately, I still feel all the crying and worrying and desperation did bring the situation forward. We'll see.

Try to enjoy the new place. I can't tell you how close we were to doing the exact same thing.

Robyn A. said...

If you need a rec for an awesome stylist who will chage your life, gimme a shout. She's in Huntington, but worth the drive. :) She is a genius with color, too.

Amy said...

I feel your pain. I hope hope hope that this works out your way.

Either way, you will still be fabulous you.

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