"...overflow school is full..."
"...backup overflow school almost full..."
"...we assigned new students using a lottery"
"...must prove residency with two pieces of mail, signed affidavit..."
"...if you claim you live with your mother, she must sign an affidavit..."
"...penalty of perjury..."
"...matriculation starts next week...hurry"
In other words, the two best public schools in the New City are full, I can't prove I live there, and I need to hurry.
Sweet Moses, this is shaping up as the best goddamn year EVER.
I have no words to express my frustration.
Wasn't it cute on Monday how I was all like "I'm going to have to put Savannah in private school!" and you were all like "You can sign her up late for public school, silly!" and I was like "Oh, good!".
Apparently, the concept of "public" is very fluid. Because for all intents and purposes, the public schools are pretty much closed to the public at this point.
Before the second overflow school sent us on to the third overflow school, they kindly informed us that "parents were lined up around the block over a month ago. The schools are filling up fast. But, your daughter will be enrolled ...somewhere."
That's right. SOMEWHERE. Maybe Egypt.
Then they added "Matriculation starts next week. You'll need to have her registered before then".
I explained that we were "in the process of moving" and she replied that that was "unfortunate".
Lady, you're telling me.
And don't even get me started on the private schools. The two we drove by looked like vets' offices.
So, two things need to happen. And they need to happen ...oh, I don't know... like, YESTERDAY. We need to get an offer on this house, sign a lease on a house in the New City, and then I need to run like my face is on fire (not really - don't ever run if your face is on fire) to the last available public school, which I can only imagine will be on the back of a rickshaw, and get this child registered, matriculated, and edumacated.
Only then will I relax.
Because I have twelve new gray hairs. And a girl can only take so much.