I May Be Schizophrenic, But At Least I'm Not At A Drunken Playdate

See, this is the problem. Every time I sit down to write all I can think about is my upcoming Mexico cruise.

I would like to write about Melissa's interview on The Today Show and how she was railroaded with accusatory questions regarding drinking alcohol during playdates.

(Lena's Subconscious: We leave Saturday!)

I would like to let you know that being the trailblazer I am I wrote about this topic awhile back and received a plethora of responses ranging from I NEVER EVER DRINK IN FRONT OF MY KIDS! to I ONLY DRINK IN FRONT OF MY KIDS BECAUSE THAT'S WHEN I NEED IT MOST DUH!

(Lena's Subconscious: Book a bikini wax!)

I'd like to state for the record that the reason this whole "Drinking in front of your kids: Do you or don't you?" brou-ha-ha has erupted has nothing to do with alcohol and has much more to do with our society's misogynistic tendencies.

(Lena's Subconscious: Why haven't my Amazon books arrived yet??)

While I am not blind to the risks of having a glass of wine while your children are solely in your care, I offer you this question to ponder: Why do you think the media has not made a peep about the longheld tradition during the holidays of the kids staying home with dad while he drinks beer and watches the game and mom is out shopping?

(Lena's Subconscious: Speaking of alcohol, fill entire extra duffel bag with booze. Am not paying six bucks for coconut juice again.)

Why does our society assume that fathers can drink while watching their children while mothers cannot be trusted? Is this in case we get the vapors and must take to our beds in our dressing gowns? Everybody knows that women are more attentive than men, which makes this all the more confusing.

(Lena's Subconscious: Must solve missing polka dot bathing suit mystery! Is only one that doesn't cut into backfat!)

It is also important that we understand that the debate on The Today Show was predicated upon A GLASS OF WINE among moms. ONE. I noticed that this seemed to be glossed over when Melissa mentioned it at the outset.

(Lena's Subconscious: What if Chris gets thrown overboard?)

To me, this is the defining factor! We're not talking about getting hammered and screaming home with the kids rolling around in the back of the minivan. We're talking about relaxing with a group of friends while our kids play.

(Lena's Subconscious: OMG. Sharks.)

And the line of questioning regarding whether you would let your babysitter drink while watching the kids? Puh-lease. The babysitter is doing her JOB. We are living our LIVES.

A life that occasionally includes alcohol. And socializing. And kids. Uh, not in that order. Moving on.

(Lena's Subconscious: 29, 30, 31. Dammit! Am totally going to start my period Saturday.)

I think we all need to be honest. Alcohol inhibits our thinking ability as humans. Period. We all know our own personal limit when that pleasant relaxation turns the corner into wearing lampshades.

(Lena's Subconscious: I hope Chris doesn't flash the judges at the poolside contest again. Was so embarrassing. Also, sort of a turn-on.)

And we should all be responsible enough to know what our personal limit is.

The insult really lies in the inference that we as moms would ever knowingly do something that would be detrimental to our kids.

(Lena's Subconscious: Wait. I'm scuba diving on my PERIOD? Why would I dress up like a SEAL while I am blood-letting into the ocean?)

At the end of the interview Meredith asks the psychologist "What do you think it means that more and more moms are taking this route?". My immediate answer: it means we've found each other! Woo-hoo!

(Lena's Subconscious: Am going to be eaten by sharks!)

Why shouldn't moms be able to relax and take a break when it is in a supportive environment?

(Lena's Subconscious: Or left behind! Like in that really really bad movie.)

While one ten minute interview cannot possibly sum up an entire debate, I do hope that seeing the segment helped other parents to check themselves. Moms and dads alike. Whether it was to question whether they may be drinking too much around their kids. Or whether it made them wonder if they've been too judgmental.

(Lena's Subconscious: Must remember to pack the cleavage-bearing dress. Also, pack the cleavage.)

At the very least I hope everyone got good and drunk over the weekend and managed not to sell their kids to gypsies.

(Lena's Subconscious: There will be much laying around and drinking! Shouldn't shock my system. Should start now...)


Butrfly4404 said...

Wow, even I'm excited about your trip...Oh, I'm not going...Now I'm depressed, thanks.

You know, after that post, I even started drinking once in a while. (I was the "I don't ever drink period." person) But you made me see the error in my ways. Who NEVER gets drunk? PLEASE!

Bobealia... said...

Love your point about the men and finding each other... where were you during the interview?
Oh, and period & sharks should not mix. Forget the scuba-ing and drink more.

Mrs. Chicky said...

Amen! I raise my glass of wine to you.

(Also? I hate you and your trip. Seriously. I wanna go!!)

(okay, fine. Have fun.)


Becky said...

Did you really not like that movie??

(Have fun on your trip! And drink some booze for me.)

Lena said...

It managed to scare me.

...but mostly with its acting. God that was bad.

brooke said...

I loved the post on the other page. And this one. Love it. Very well articulated.

Marcia said...

Seriously. If you get eaten by a shark in Mexico before we get to have a drink together (With Vi! In February!), I'll be super mad. Super.

Linsey said...

So then it would be considered "bad" that I have no pain anywhere in my body yet started my day with a vicodin? Wait, I do have pain... emotional pain... Oh, who am I kidding I found one lone leftover and thought when 3 out of 5 kids woke up screaming , 1 wet the bed the other took off his poopy diaper the other 2 were late for school and we have no plans of needing to drive anywhere, why not!?!?!

Have a good trip!!! Wish I were going on a cruise!

blog Portland said...

It's not that I like my kids more when I've been drinking, I like EVERYONE more when I've been drinking.

Kristin said...

I want to party with your subconscious.

Lisa said...

I'm with Kristin. Actually, I think it would be fun to live in "Lenaland" (aka your subconscious).

Have fun on your trip. And I hope your trip to Mexico doesn't involve some questionable seafood pasta that leads you to lose 4 pounds and have bad stomach cramps for several weeks. Gah

metalia said...

Have a great time on your cruise! Just try to avoid the elderly; they get very territorial about deck chairs, and they are FEISTY mofos.

Anonymous said...

Have fun!! I can't believe I didn't realize it was so close (and I'm glad that sharks are not going to eat you...)

themikestand said...

Excellent post (and highly entertaining work by your subconscious, btw) -- Just for the record, I was astounded by the interview in question.

And the only reason not to drink in front of your kids is because they could totally knock your drink over; we all know how clumsy kids are.

Anonymous said...
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Domestic Slackstress said...

I posted about this the morning the segment aired. My reaction was ambiguous. What can I say, I'm drunk right now. No really ... I love your blog and wish I could afford a sleek design like yours ... and a paying blog gig. How do you do it all while mothering at the same time?

Y said...


I love you! Have fun!

y said...

You know that was from ME, right? Because I am a jackass who hit enter before typing in http://joyunexpected.


Her Bad Mother said...

AM jealous that you are off somewhere drinking. Will compensate by drinking here, on my couch, while child watches Teletubbies.

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