My mom has Savannah this weekend and I am drunk with availability. I can do laundry. I can do shopping. I can do Bar Mitzvahs and weddings.
I can annoy the living hell out of my husband.
Actual conversation between Chris and I this morning:
"Chris come look at Dooce's new calendar. Chuck is SO yummy."
"Lena, I really can't. I'm trying to WORK."
"You think you're better than me?"
(sigh) "No, I don't. I just have a deadline that I..."
"What I am doing is very important. I am spending your money as you simultaneously make it. Right. Next. To. You. You see the synergy between us?"
"With every click of my mouse another dollar is spent. I am your motivation. The fire under your ass."
"I'd rather not look at it that way."
"Oh, look. I just bought shoes. Just while you were talking. See how quickly it happens?"
"FINE," *steps away from his desk and comes over*, "I will look at Dooce's calendar."
"I'm willing to do a centerfold and it's like you don't even CARE."